Love Hurts

I have decided that I want this to be the theme of this next year of my life. Love Hurts. Here is a truth that many people (myself included) struggle to accept. So much of what we look for, what we cling to, is comfort. We expect love to be safe and comfortable. But the reality of Jesus’ Love is that it was surrounded by extraordinarily painful circumstances. Does Love bring us comfort? Yes. Will Love always be comfortable? No.

It is so easy to Love people, especially in the Kingdom of God. When we have Christ in us and working through us, it becomes easy to look clearly at the people around us and to pour Love into their lives. Maybe that is why we are so afraid. We are afraid of what will happen when we open up to Love. I will say that again. Most of us are afraid. We are afraid of loving and what that could mean to our carefully controlled lives. All we have to do is put our hands out, let God pour His love into them, and our lives will be ruined for all else but Him.

My own struggle with fear came through experience. After I realized how painful Love could be, I decided that I don’t like vulnerability. Why should I risk myself for them? Why should I be open? Why should I cry over people that I barely know?

My heart went on a journey. It is still traveling. I have seen growth that only the breath of God could make possible. What has happened has only been possible through the steady rain of grace and mercy into my life. I have gone from unwillingness to readiness. Something is coming. I am ready. I am still afraid!!!! But I am ready.

I am going to Haiti in four days. This trip is so full of God’s presence on it that I can hardly talk about it without making people (and myself) cry. I know that my heart is going to break. How could I see those things and be unmoved? Yet, somehow I feel like I will be strengthened through the process, not defeated. In our sufferings we become more like Christ. The story of what God is doing through this trip will continue.

I will continue to tell it here. I plan on blogging as much as possible about my experiences in Haiti after I get back. I am sure that I will have plenty to tell about.

Someday

Someday we will hold the sunlight,
It will not fade away
With shining faces walking-
Walk and not grow faint.

Someday we will see you truly,
No more shades of grey
We can know and love each other,
When grass and flower fade.

Today, I live for someday,
Today, I live for Hope.
This Hope is something greater
Than the Hope we thought we lost.

Someday we will walk rightly,
When you take our pain
No more to bear our sorrow-
“Redeemed” will be our name.

With shining faces now unveiled
Knowing that this life will fade,
Waiting- You will take our pain.
Let your Kingdom come today.

Let it be as it is- Someday.